bereft is the word.
my mistakes have been many.
and there will be more.
and so my heart aches
and my eyes flood
tears born of regret and embarrassment
a fair helping of self-pity.
i cannot undo my fuck ups.
my apologies do not assuage my guilt.
i want to hide from everyone.
there is even the small, dark, persistent
wish to be dead.
done with the test.
my fragility is winning.
and my ignorance.
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